Mother had always warned me about the weird people of New York City. I heard her hoarse, commanding voice so many times saying: “Amanda, don’t walk around the city alone. There are weird people strolling up and down the streets of Manhattan.”
But of course, I had been a girl, who was far too curious to listen to a mother’s advice.
***
The soft beams of the setting fall sun warmed my cheeks as I strolled down towards Central Park. My weekend friends would have already started the baseball game without me, since I was a bit late, as always.
We usually went right after the boring Saturday afternoon service of St. Dunstan. But since I bailed out on Mrs. Blumsbotton’s bible lectures and instead enjoyed an afternoon at home listening to the radio, everybody was already there. Everybody, except me.
People were leaving work to enjoy this late fall afternoon and to catch some daylight before the city would only be lit with the new neon signs. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the sounds of city life. Hundreds of yellow taxis were honking at pedestrians, who probably stopped in the middle of Times Square to look at the big colorful poster for the new movie The Wizard of Oz. It had just been placed there a few days ago. I opened my eyes again and started to walk down the road.
Mothers and their dolled-up children stared at me as I jumped foolishly around a lantern pole and stretched out my tongue at a pit-bull. He was kept on a short leash by his owner, which seemed to be a ritzy lady in a fancy fur coat. A girl about my age, dressed like one of these new Barbie dolls, pointed her clumsy finger at me. She whispered to her mother, probably complaining why I could dance around Columbus Circle without a chaperone while she was cuffed to her mother’s firm hands. I always loved that kind of attention.
The air was filled with the smell of freshly cooked hotdogs and the sweet odor of giggle water. I knew that the night owls were dressing up for their midnight adventures.
Here, I spotted her the first time. A grey dressed figure with long white wavy hair and pale lips was walking on the other side of the street. She strolled down 8th Avenue in front of one of these new tall glass buildings, which were suddenly growing everywhere in the city. She turned her head a few times to glimpse at me while her grey coat danced in the wind. I stopped and was facing the other side of the avenue to get a better look of this colorless witch. She stopped too.
Her narrow eyes were staring at me without blinking. I shivered and turned around to run into Central Park. I desperately tried to shake off the gruesome image of the old lady from my mind. The thought hit me that I shouldn’t have sneaked out of the apartment without telling Mother. The numbers of weird people always increased once the sun had disappeared behind the horizon.
As my bare feet touched the soft grass of the park, the light had disappeared behind the horizon and only left of few brush strokes of bright orange clouds in the sky. I had arrived at the baseball field only to realize that my friends had already walked home. They didn’t even wait for me.
I walked around the empty field and bent down to touch the wet sand, where they must have just finished playing. My feet and hands got numb as the cooling wind howled over the empty field.
“What is she doing there?” I heard a whisper behind me.
“Leave her alone. We should just go home,” said another, deeper voice.
I turned around and saw how two boys had appeared on the field. Neither of them were from here I grew up. They both had darker skin. The fat one, who was about my age, carried a small ball and had already put the baseball glove on to start playing. The other one was a tall, muscular and an older version of the fat one. He had the hint of facial hair and was resting his bat on his shoulder.
“Jimmy, let’s leave,” whispered the tall one in hope I would not hear what he said. But I had ears like a bat.
“Who is this?” Jimmy stepped a little closer to me, but the tall one dragged him back.
My eyes focused on the foot marks of a long finished game in the sand before I replied. “My friends are all gone,” I said and tried to smile friendly.
“I bet that!” The tall one stared at me like I was his worst nightmare. He started breathing heavily.
“Don’t be such a jerk, Adam.” Jimmy released himself from Adam’s grip and walked towards me. “She needs help, don’t you see that.”
“Jimmy!” shouted Adam. “Stay here.”
But Jimmy had already walked towards me and moved his head around to observe me. “What are you doing all alone out here in the dark?”
“I wanted to play baseball. But everyone is gone.” I looked towards the dark sky and started to get mad at myself that I had not left earlier. “Do you want to play a match with me?”
“Not with you, you insane creep!” Adam jumped a step towards me and dragged Jimmy back. “Mom put me in charge of you and I say we better leave.”
His eyes searched mine in the weak light of the lantern poles around the field and blinked as he stuttered: “Th...Th…Thank you very much for this kind offer but we pre… prefer to play another time!”
“But Adam,” yelled Jimmy and tried to break free from Adam’s grip. But he was weak and chubby, so he had no choice but let his brother drag him away from the baseball field.
As they reached the hill, I could see Adam looking at me one more time before he started running like hell hounds were chasing him.
I circled around the empty field once more pretending to have a home run before I actually started to head off back home. Mother would be really mad at me. I could already hear her high pitch yells in my ear and felt my stomach rumble as I knew I wouldn’t get dessert for the next week. And all was for nothing. My friends were already gone.
Before I reached the end of Central Park I smelled something unusual and stopped for a moment. I followed this odor and knew that I stood in front Central Park Zoo as I touched the cold bars of the closed front gates. The last time I had been here was when Father was still around. For a second it felt several decades ago since I had last been here. After Father’s illness, I avoided coming here.
“Look at the bears,” he always said. “There is a little one and a big one to protect it, just like us two.”
A few months after Father’s funeral the big bear disappeared and the little bear had no one to feel safe anymore, just like me.
I climbed up the fence to get a better view on the animals. Some parts were still under construction, but the handyman had already left the scene while the zoo keepers were counting their income and closing the gates. Nobody else was there. The zoo was empty and all children’s laughter and parent’s gasps as they saw monkeys for the first time were gone. I stared for a moment at the three newborn infants of the mountain goat and the empty field of the wolf’s cage before I wanted to head off.
As I caught her pale face again for the hint of a second, I lost my grip and fell off the fence. I felt a terrible pain in my butt as my body hit the hard pavement. I had seen the witch again. Her greyish eyes had stared at me from behind the barred windows of the wolf shelter. I was breathing heavily, and an unpleasant sting in my right chest was spreading throughout my whole body. I had to leave. Without looking back I started running.
Who was she and why was she following me? I reached the pond and realized that nobody followed me. My eyes hushed around to see if there was anybody here. There was nobody. I let myself fall on the stones of the bridge crossing the pond and tried to calm myself down.
The image of the witch came back to my head whispering familiar sounds. I realized that it was not smart to stay here. The light of the new street lanterns was now turned on everywhere in the park. But as I wanted to get up to walk home, a woman with bright blond curls was running towards me.
“Finally!” I heard the woman exclaim. She was talking to herself covering her left ear with one hand. “Yes, Central Park. Why didn’t we think ‘bout this earlier?”
She stumbled towards me, weirdly smiling at me. Her hair was dyed too many times like she tried to be one of these new movie starlets and her underwear was visible under a horrible ink painting on her hip.
“What are you doin’ here?” she asked me.” You shouldn’t be out here!”
“Phonus balonus, I can do what I want!” I replied and turned my head to show that our conversation was over.
They lady was silent for a second and then asked me: “Why are you out?” I turned around and realized how her eyes widened as she waited for the answer.
“If you would excuse me, lady, this is none of your business,” I mocked her and wanted to jump off the stone wall to leave, but her hand stopped me. She was stronger than I expected.
“You are coming home with me,” she said and tried to smile.
A shiver went down my back as I realized what kind of person she must be. I looked at her face. She had dragon earrings on the tip of her ears and her face had way too much makeup. Under her awfully sweet apple perfume, I could still smell the thick layer of freshly smoked cigarettes. With this, I knew that she must be one of the colorful evil people Mother warned me about.
“I should leave,” I said and hesitated, thinking if I could outrun her or not. Her heavy hand was still pushing me down on the cold stones of the bridge.
“I will take care of you,” she said. “Trust me, just come home with me.”
“Home,” I yelled and hit with my arms in all directions. “You are not my mother.”
She did not seem intimidated and kneeled down so that her eyes were facing mine. Her hands softly touched my cheeks. The tears, that had formed under her green eyes as she spoke, weirdly spread the feeling of guilt inside my heart.
“No you’re right,” she said. “I am not your mother.” She took a heavy breath and stared at me. She wiped the tears out of her eyes by using the sleeve of her blouse. “I am not your mother but you are my mother! “
A giggle started to form in my mouth, but before it had the chance to come out, reality hit me as hard as if someone had kicked a soccer ball to my head.
I finally understood. I always hated waking up from a nice dream. But to wake up from reality to a nightmare is something that leaves you numb. Then it moves through your whole body. You feel love, hate, guilt, regret and sadness of losses at all once. My pale shaking hands slowly moved towards my daughter’s face and gently touched it. For a second, I glimpsed at the reflection of me and my daughter in the pond. My white hair and my grey robe were softly moved by the wind and I finally recognized the old grey lady, who had been following me since I left the apartment. She was me.
***
My mother was right: New York was full of all kinds of weird people, and I had become one of them.